Damn, I hate it when you change the size of an image and its resolution just shoots right to hell. Pixelation, degradation of colour quality.... pet peeves of mine. Another image of デス・ザ・キッド from Soul Eater. The character is so spastic, but simply too funny to draw (though I do agree with symmetry being the best thing). Figured pink would be a nice colour to use with such a menacing person. Can't wait for the "黒龍" chapter translated into anime and see some of the Bones-animated fight scenes. Bound to be good. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Received college assignment from my graduate school, and I''m pretty pleased about it. I won't be getting the scholarship I wanted, but disappointments are a part of life and no one can have everything happen their way. I'm just having slight anxiety attacks over packing everything up from H.K. and heading over to the U.K. (as opposed to last time when I left for the U.S.....it was a nightmare getting stuff over there and back after four years), and meeting really smart people. What if I revert back to being antisocial and appear totally daft in front of others? What if my current level of knowledge is not up to par? What if I start having those recurring stutters of mine back in the undergraduate days? ARGHH??? Concerns such as these are normal....right?
My mother also wants to accompany me and my father to the U.K. for the start of term, and whilst I appreciate the sentiment it is also troublesome to have a parent nearby when you're trying to....fit into a new crowd. (E.g. during freshman year she kept asking if I wanted to stay in the hotel with her during the middle of the week, after the term started). I'll regret telling her not to go with me, but I'll also feel obligated to spend the first few days of school with her just because she made the trip overseas. And if I do that, how will I even manage to hang out with fellow classmates? It's not my mother's fault, just that these persistent feelings of guilt [when I can't meet with her] never go away.
Don't even get me started on what will happen if my parents die in the future. Its a mental realm I venture to constantly (not that I want them to die, of course...but it is an inevitable fact that shouldn't be ignored), but end up feeling depressed and scared. It's not the separation that irks me, but the strange feeling of removal of someone from my life. Such morbid thoughts on a Friday....hate to think that stuff would come up on the following Monday.
I didn't share these worries with anyone (because they sound stupid when I voice them out loud), yet I wish someone would just tell me everything will turn out alright. Maybe a bottle of booze (just joking, I don't drink) and some Prozac will be the ones to say it.
My mother also wants to accompany me and my father to the U.K. for the start of term, and whilst I appreciate the sentiment it is also troublesome to have a parent nearby when you're trying to....fit into a new crowd. (E.g. during freshman year she kept asking if I wanted to stay in the hotel with her during the middle of the week, after the term started). I'll regret telling her not to go with me, but I'll also feel obligated to spend the first few days of school with her just because she made the trip overseas. And if I do that, how will I even manage to hang out with fellow classmates? It's not my mother's fault, just that these persistent feelings of guilt [when I can't meet with her] never go away.
Don't even get me started on what will happen if my parents die in the future. Its a mental realm I venture to constantly (not that I want them to die, of course...but it is an inevitable fact that shouldn't be ignored), but end up feeling depressed and scared. It's not the separation that irks me, but the strange feeling of removal of someone from my life. Such morbid thoughts on a Friday....hate to think that stuff would come up on the following Monday.
I didn't share these worries with anyone (because they sound stupid when I voice them out loud), yet I wish someone would just tell me everything will turn out alright. Maybe a bottle of booze (just joking, I don't drink) and some Prozac will be the ones to say it.
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